Ingredients For A Successful Relationship
You waited patiently to meet your person. You're now in a relationship; how do you ensure the success of your relationship? Grab your apron because this week, I'm cooking up a successful relationship with these key ingredients:
Trust
Communication
Passion & Compatibility
Respect
Healthy Conflict Resolution
Sense of Humor
Team mentality
Do you have these ingredients stocked in your mental pantry?
Jot down this recipe. It's from my personal kitchen to yours.
Without Trust, there isn't a relationship. Trust is hard to earn and easy to lose. Knowing that we're human, imperfect beings, we are bound to make mistakes. It's important to keep the Trust between you and your partner sacred. No matter how uncomfortable a situation may be, it's crucial always to tell your partner the truth. Lying is not the answer.
The next ingredient is Communication. Communication, as an ingredient, can be compared to Indian Spices. There are several varieties. They each have a unique flavor, level of spiciness, medium to fire, and when used correctly, they make a culinary masterpiece. Not understanding which spices to use or how much can make for some disastrous curry. The first thing to ensure is that you are communicating. You're taking things through, listening to your partner, using I statements vs. You statements can be taken as an attack or place blame on your partner. You statements are a surefire way to get heartburn. Likewise, you should feel comfortable being able to say what's on your mind, to express your thoughts and feelings freely, and also be able to receive in the same regard.
The next ingredient is a duo. They go together, Passion and Compatibility. Passion helped guide you into a relationship, a burning desire to be with your partner, to grow with your partner, to fall in love with your partner. Compatibility helps you sustain that passion. Of course, sex and intimacy are important, but sex cannot maintain a relationship for the long haul. Sharing compatible traits and values, genuinely enjoying time spent together outside of the bedroom, and a solid foundational friendship will help keep the passion alive.
The next ingredient, you guessed it, Respect. It's essential to have mutual Respect in a relationship and not just when everything is roses and daffodils but also when shit hits the fan. As human beings, we change and evolve. As we grow as individuals, we mustn't lose sight of Respect for our partner. We may need to exercise grace with ourselves and with our significant other.
The next ingredient may be challenging, Healthy Conflict Resolution. Conflict is inevitable, and some tension in a relationship provides balance. However, suppose you as a unit are unable to problem solve, to arrive at a resolution, which may require one person apologizing to the other, or both parties apologizing and forgiving. However that looks, you'll be in a world of hurt. If Healthy Conflict Resolution were a pot of water on the stovetop boiling, your job as a couple would be to resolve the issue before the pot boils over. How do you deescalate the heat and get the water to a controlled boil? This is not a one size fits all part of the recipe. This is where your pinch might be my heaping spoonful. Find what works for you.
The next ingredient is a Sense of Humor. Laughter is the best medicine. If you're committed to being in a relationship for a long time, a sense of humor is a staple ingredient. You can't take yourself too seriously. Laugh together—Laugh in the face of adversity. Drop grudges, ditch any animosity and take a page out of my book, and snort. Life's too short not to enjoy it.
The last ingredient is Team Mentality. When you're in a relationship, you're two individuals functioning as a unit. In the spirit of teamwork, you should recognize each member's strengths and also areas of opportunities. This will allow you to balance the best traits from each person to maximize them in your relationship: one team, one dream.
You can have a relationship without all seven ingredients, but just like baking a cake without baking powder, it won't rise to its full potential. Like with any recipe, it requires some prep time, patience, focus, unless it's Tik Tok pasta, and making sure you've added the right amount of each ingredient. Make sure you ask Alexa to set a timer so you don't overdo it. There are several parallels here, but if you're a novice in the kitchen and have been single for a long time like I was, remember, practice over perfection, consistency, and effort. You can never go wrong with PCE: practice, consistency, and effort.
