6 Reasons Why Dating Yourself Is Key

Why should you date yourself? For my single folks out there, how comfortable do you feel being alone? Do you jump from relationship to relationship without pausing to reflect on what went right, what went wrong, and what can be learned from the date, relationship, experience? If you're in a relationship, have you lost your individual identity since you've been a couple? Have you become co-dependent on your partner?

Any relationship, including the one with yourself, requires work. If you do the work, the benefits and rewards are abundant. So let's start simple. Let's start with six simple reasons why you should date yourself.

Reason #1: Dating yourself is a confidence builder.It puts the onus on you. It allows you to put yourself first, to make a decision that makes you, and only you, happy and honors your wants and desires. It might seem odd to go to a restaurant solo or take yourself to a movie alone, but it shouldn’t. As much as we may be concerned by what others might think or how we’ll be perceived, it shouldn’t matter. Most people aren’t paying attention to you anyway. They’re too consumed with themselves. Or they may even look to you with admiration, wishing they had the courage to do things alone.

Reason #2: Get to know yourself better. It doesn’t matter if you’re single or in a relationship. You, yourself, are changing, growing, evolving. It’s important to keep a pulse on who you are as an individual. It’s often when we lose track of who we are that we feel unfulfilled in a relationship, or we seek out things in a relationship that don’t really serve us but rather fill a void. How are you with silence? Do you find it uncomfortable or comfortable? When you’re alone, you learn to embrace silence. The more time you spend alone with your thoughts, the more it feels natural.

Reason #3: We've all seen the meme where the guy asks the girl what she wants to eat, and she says, "I don't know." And then it takes 45 minutes to decide where to go for dinner, and by that time, both people are hangry and frustrated. Dating yourself allows you to call the shots, make the decisions, not feel pressure or influence to make a decision because the only person's opinion you're considering is your own. This can be difficult for people who've been in relationships for some time because they're conditioned to take other's likes into consideration and, in doing so over the years, may have lost track of what they like, enjoy, etc. Dating yourself requires no compromise.

Reason #4: You'll feel empowered by your independence. When you're on your own, you have to rely on yourself. This ties in with self-confidence. By solving problems that may come up, trying new things by yourself, and making decisions based on your own accord, you will become more independent. You'll be proud of these small victories and have a sense of accomplishment.

Reason #5: You learn to love yourself. If you're single and desire a healthy relationship, it's essential to learn to love yourself first before loving someone else. Likewise, if you're in a relationship and don't love yourself, it can cause many issues and be toxic to the relationship. Dating yourself requires you to develop this relationship, to allow yourself grace, and to embrace the process of evolving, growing, and progressing. When you understand this and how it impacts your relationship with yourself, it will also open your eyes and lend to how you approach relationships with others. That same grace you need to display to yourself can help extend to your partner at times.

Reason #6: How you treat yourself is a good barometer of how you'll allow others to treat you. It's setting a standard, a bar, and knowing your worth. Someone's opinion does not determine your worth. Your worth starts with your opinion of yourself. If we can't talk to ourselves nicely if we don't respect ourselves, how can we expect others to? How you treat yourself sets the standard for how others treat you. In setting the benchmark to spend time with yourself, you show that you value and prioritize yourself.