Manifesting My Ideal Man

Apr 15

If you’re like me, you started your journey to find love with a lengthy list of what you envision your perfect man to be. And if you believe in The Secret, like I do, this list is everything. It’s your wish list to the universe. You draft it, then write it down in your favorite journal. You know, the one with the cliché cover that reads Dream It Believe It Achieve It. It’s pink with gold binding and came with a froufrou feather pen. Then you wait patiently for the universe to deliver based on the Law Of Attraction.

I made this list on August 9, 2015:

faithful
muscular/athletic
sense of humor
kind
well off
enjoys football
5’11” or above
wants to get married
successful
hard working
loyal
does the little things
driven
makes me laugh
thoughtful
affectionate
wants to have a family
honest
funny

On December 29, 2018, I added, all of this or better, a suggestion by my Reiki Practitioner.

If you believe in The Secret or Law of Attraction, then you know from here you: visualize, affirm, exude positivity and practice gratitude. Easy enough, right? Um, it’s been almost four years since I made that list and although I’ve always considered myself more of a Carrie/Samantha hybrid, my inner Charlotte is surfacing,

“It’s true. I’ve been dating since I was 15. I’m exhausted. Where is he?”

However, I’m not sure if I’d notice if my Harry Goldenblatt were right, smack-dab in front of my face. My point is, Charlotte was initially turned off by Harry. I’m sure messy eater, heavy sweater, excessively hairy body wasn’t on her list of an ideal man. Although fictional, they went on to marry, adopt and have a child of their own. The quintessential happily ever after. Am I missing out on my Harry because I have this wish list?

Meanwhile, I’m cracking jokes about being a single, aspiring cat lady. I entertain dates from all ages, races, and socioeconomic statuses. I do try to only swipe right on men whose profiles have the word “relationship” following the magnifying glass and “want someday” after the baby bottle. However, we all know that false advertising is a thing and there’s no exception in the dating world. Could the universe be confused by my mixed messages? I’m going to believe the answer is, YES!

I’m not sure how I correct this, or if I really understand what I want, or how that list came to be. Reflecting, which is something I feel is essential to personal growth and a necessary practice, I almost believe that society, family, and even friends, influenced this list. If my conscious mind is manifesting something opposite of my subconscious mind, could I be stuck in some kind of Secret purgatory?